Day 2: Write something….
Write something someone told you about yourself that you never forgot…
“You’re one of a kind. You’re the most genuine, crazy, friendly and humble person I knew. You’re all in one. You have that contagious laugh, making the silliest joke the funniest one. I’m not wondering you got tons of friends!”
I’ve been thinking all day and night what to write, and I remembered this one birthday greeting from one my friends that hit me right into the bones. This is actually one of the most memorable and sweetest message I got on my birthday. Sometimes I’m thankful that birthdays are created because you get the chance to receive those sweet messages (aside from gifts tho hahaha) from your precious gems!
As I grow older, I never thought that someone sees me as a wonderful person like her. I’m just a typical crazy girl, duh. I’m actually open to bullies (bc I bully most of the people I’m close with) I rarely received compliments which I’m [kinda bit] thankful though, because I don’t know how to treat them, I might just give you a wacky face, call you crazy, or pretend that I didn’t hear anything.
Way back, I was never the sociable one. I suck at making friends, and getting out of my comfort zone feels like it could kill me once I step out of it. That lead me to be a girl who doesn’t have enough confidence (up to now) that I can actually do something. I’m always doubtful with myself when I do something on my own, it’s either it would fail or, it would fail. There’s no space in between. It’s a lose-lose situation. I tried learning to trust (and love) myself, but it’s something that it’s so hard for me to do. I always see the bad side of me, and it’s something I can’t stop. Even a gazillion motivational quotes, or a sea of alcohol can’t remove this bad habit that I have, and I think I just have to live with it.
I always see myself as no one, and it’s heartening receiving those types of messages knowing that someone remembered something about you, and to them you’re somebody, not just anybody — but I have to cut this off, because me and my emotional tendencies are kicking in.
Until such time that I learned (little by little) to divert the negativity. There are rare times that I push myself harder to do something, and little by little I think I can let it out and for once do something good.
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